Christmas Tea (NM) - 19th November - 2nd December

Anxiety, dancing, dates and a realisation.

This one sentence pretty much sums up the first week of this update. 

A little selfie from when I did my interview. Yep this is my new fave
pose... oh well!
This week is the first post for my Tea Leaves series. Life update posts seem to be popular amongst you all so I've decided to upload a little update every other week, this will be something similar to a two weekly vlog but written. I'm going to see how this one goes and then decide if I want to do these more frequently or space it out even further. 

Monday 19th November:
This week began with crazy crazy anxiety. Why? I have no idea. I can't settle, can't concentrate and don't want to leave the comfort of my uni bedroom. This means I didn't go into uni and then spent my morning stressing even more about my attendance, there is just no winning today.

Monday's Instagram post.
Never the less, I took a nap and forced myself up out of bed and made it my aim to at least to one thing that is worthwhile even if I'm feeling completely out of my depth and on edge. I needed to take a pair of shoes back and it was the last day to return them so I dragged myself into town. It was hard work don't get me wrong but I bought a few Christmas presents and treat myself to a few books (which can be seen in this book haul) and some new Mickey Mouse joggers that are seriously the cutest thing ever! 

Surprisingly, when I got back from town I felt a little better and more motivated to get things sorted. I done the washing, tidied my messy bedroom and took the bins out which made me feel even better. I felt that much better: I was even ready to face people and even socialise! I had a good, long catch-up with Sophie which was very much needed and yet left me feeling tired and needing some me time. I finished my day off feeling happy and content with an early night!

So, to sum up, Monday started off pretty shit but finished a lot better and with a lot less anxiety. 

Wednesday's Instagram post. I didn't post on Tuesday so its jumped
straight to Wednesday!
Tuesday 20th November:
Today I went to uni! Gold star for Niamh!! It was cold and wet which lead to me putting little to no effort in for uni which felt nice for a change. I wore my new joggers and turtleneck, of course, a little mascara and my rings and hoops but still this is pretty much the worst I've ever looked for uni... Well, it is if we ignore that one Tuesday I was very hungover and still smelt like whiskey even though I had been stood in the shower for like 40 minutes that morning to sober me up... yep I went to my 9am still drunk and smelling like my drink of choice the night before... We've all been there, right? 

I thought to add my Instagram posts to break up the text
Today felt like a good day, I was feeling good after my lectures and workshops. Felt somewhat proud of me for turning up when I still have a few anxious thoughts swimming around my head. I began to tackle my to-do list and top priority was booking a ticket to the social media workshop for an assignment only I missed the cut off date for the tickets which left me feeling more stressed than ever about deadlines and assignments. I took my chances and emailed the organiser who I had been organising interviews with to see if it was still possible to attend to which she said it would be no problem. I felt like it was a massive weight lifted off my shoulders and the 2 hours I waited felt like years! This made me feel so much better about deadlines and assignments yet there was still a little annoyance in the back of my mind telling me there was no way I was going to get everything done. 

I took the only step I could think of to get rid of these thoughts and wrote out all my deadlines and what I had to do for each of them all the way down to what research I was going to do. This gave me a little peace and helped me to think a lot more rationally about what I actually have to do which really isn't a great deal. By this point, I was exhausted and it was well and truly bedtime! 

So, a little summary, Tuesday was in whole a good day!

Friday's Instagram post. This is my fave so far this
week
Wednesday 21st November:
It's the middle of the week and my sleeping pattern was still all over... Anxiety was bad again and I'm struggling to do normal everyday things. Never the less, I force myself to uni with the promise of my first grade back from uni. I GOT A FIRST! Yep, this lil nerd pulled it off and got top marks!

I spent most of the day emailing back and forth with trying to organise interviews and news stories. All my ideas were pretty much shot down when I couldn't find anyone to take part in the interview side of it. I made a new list of ideas and began researching what I could do and who would be suitable to interview for each story as well as a list of questions for each interview.

So, basically, today was a boring day and I spent it doing uni work and getting everything sorted and organised.

Thursday 22rd November:
Today was again another rough start and was honestly a pretty shit day but I had a little realisation.


Saturday's Instagram post. A little low-quality selfie!
To someone, you're always going to be considered to be "toxic" in their eyes. However, for every person that considers you to be a "toxic" person there is going to a bunch of people that love you as a person, find comfort in your relationship and who you bring happiness to. It is important to focus on you and making yourself happy and that is what everyone should do. If someone focusing on themselves is removing you from their life. Let them. It might hurt at first but it could also be something that you need too and you didn't know.


And the picture that finished week one off! Which has
became my new favourite!
Friday 23rd November:
Today was the day I had been dreading all week. The time for me to be a journalist for a few hours. My anxiety was through the roof and I talked myself out of going 3 times before I actually left the house. I was so so glad I went everyone was so lovely and Elliot gave some amazing answers to my questions. I finished off Friday with a night curled up in bed with a Christmas film.

Today I was pretty proud of myself to say my anxiety had been up all week but I pushed through and went and managed to do it without being too stuttery and shaky.

Saturday 24th November:
I spent today with Harvey before he had to go to work and I was going out drinking. Yep, I got a little drunk but I hadn't drunk since Halloween. It felt good to get done up and go out again, yet I realised that drinking isn't actually for me anymore. I prefer nights in and chill daytime drinks, I just get so tired and grumpy being up late... I sound like a grandma! What happened!!

Sunday 25th November:
A pretty sunrise was taken at uni to start off next week...
Even though I didn't end up going in.
Sunday was a lazy hungover day even though I was adamant I wasn't drunk... I slept on and off most of the day and done absolutely nothing which was pretty good, to be honest. I felt like I needed a day doing nothing and not trying to get a to-do list done. Once I was semi-alive, brushed my teeth without gagging and had some food without wanting to be sick I spent some time with Harvey. This week has been Harvey, Harvey, HARVEY! Well, guess what kids! This bitch got herself a boyfriend today! Yep, Harvey asked me to be his girlfriend... again... but that's another story!

To put into perspective, this week was quite literally a rollercoaster! But on the whole, I enjoyed my week and finished Sunday with a full heart and the biggest smile!! 

A happy heart!

This describes my second week perfectly.

I even convinced them both to squash into a
photobooth with me!! 
Monday 26th November:
Today was a day for the heart. After an amazing Sunday, I just didn't want it to be Monday, so I ignored Monday and didn't go into uni. Instead, I had a big catch-up and food with Owen at dinner time which was 100% needed! I hadn't seen him in what felt like forever because of not going into uni much last week. Then I cooked tea for me and Harvey... Yep, I've turned domestic... I must be happy! After tea, we had a good cuddle and a film marathon! Monday was short and sweet but felt good! I got a little bit of work done but not anything substantial. 

Tuesday 27th November:
I had a good old caffeine-fueled productive day today! I got up like fully up and out of bed at 6 for the first time in ages came to uni and was showered, washed hair and dressed by half past! 

A cute lil pic of Owen outside Cole Cafe!
Tuesday's are always my favourite day of the week even though I have a 9am and its a long day. I really enjoy my Tuesday morning lecture and workshop, I actually get to write! The feedback I received on my most recent writing was that it was pretty far off from what my lecturer was looking for so I have that to edit or re-do or even a whole new idea. It was a how-to piece and basically, it was pretty dull, boring and long... I'm thinking of writing about blogging rather than productivity. 

I have an hour break in the middle of my day too which is when Owen and I tend to go to the seafront. Not too long ago we saw a cute little cafe and have been meaning to go in, well today was the day! It was amazing! Nice coffee and such pretty interior too! 

It's just soooo bloody cute! I'm obsessed!! Cole Cafe
and Deli, if you're in Sunderland I highly recommend.
I didn't want today to end, it felt good. I was happy, smiling and felt like I had finally found my place and somewhere I belong other than at home. Today was one of those days where you can't help but stand back and realise how lucky you are. Owen wanted to go to this Christmassy tipi thing that's in town but I was supposed to be spending time with Harveys so I invited him along and to see one of my best friends and boyfriend getting along and just spending time together was one of the best things ever! I felt like I was going to burst from how happy I was at any second. Harvey also got the seal of approval from Owen which made me nearly cry! 

So, all in all, Tuesday was amazing and I can't wait to read back on this in a few weeks or even months time and re-live this day again! 

Wednesday 28th November:
Wednesday started with a heavy head, coughing fit and a whole body that hurt... Yep, I got ill! I stayed in bed and felt sorry for myself while Harvey was at uni. To top it off I started being sick also... EW! Harvey came back from uni with my favourite snacks and all the cold and flu tablets he could find, he melts me lil heart, I tell you! I pretty much stayed asleep on and off until 9pm when I came alive and wanted to be up out of bed. We stuck Elf on, ate snacks and I belted Christmas songs out for at least an hour... I'm blaming the caffeine in the cold and flu!

It's nearly Christmas!!
Thursday 29th November:
Again I went into uni! Yay for me! My news stories are coming along well only it completely slipped my mind that my stories had to be around the North East and Sunderland... I had nearly written one full news story when I showed my tutor and she mentioned about it not being based in Sunderland so I'm scrambling around either trying to come up with more ideas or to amend the written story...

Friday 30th November:
Friday was a good day, I was pretty lazy I'm not going to lie. I spent the day in bed watching Sherlock with Harvey until it was time for me to leave. I had a little spontaneous date with Harvey before I came home for the weekend which was nice. It feels really good to be home!

Saturday 1st December:
Saturday began with a lush sleep in and family time! We put the tree up!! So really I don't absolutely nothing... Other than chill and spend time with my fam!

Sunday 2nd December:
Another day spent with my fam... we went ice skating and to a Christmas park!!

Much Love, 
Niamh X


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